Parenting Reflections

Teaching Mudras to Children

When parents discover that mudras do indeed reduce their stress, often they want to teach them to their children. This works well if one does it in steps.

1. Just teach the gesture, by itself.
2. Explain the purpose of the gesture to your child, and have them practice it “in pretend.”
3. Model using the gesture yourself.
4. Suggest your child use the gesture at a time when they really need it.

Let’s use the mudra Cheerfulness as an  example.
To do it, you put your hands on either side of your navel, palms up, fingers facing each other. With each hand, make a fist with your thumb inside.
Breathe deeply and slowly for 3 minutes.

To teach it, first, just have them do the gesture.
You could say, “Let’s put the baby in the baby carriage.”
Then, you wrap your fingers around the thumb. You can make a game of it!

Next, you could read a story to your child where someone is sad. You could say, “I bet this gesture, for cheerfulness would make the person in the story not be so sad.  Let’s teach it to her!”
You both practice the gesture together, pretending to help the person in the story.

When you are feeling sad, you could say, I’m feeling sad.  I’m going to try that gesture for cheerfulness and see if it helps. When you do the gesture, you are modeling the behavior for your child.

The next time your child is feeling sad,  suggest they try that gesture for cheerfulness. Now that they already know how to do the gesture, have practiced it “in pretend”, and seen you use it, they are much more likely to do it successfully.

When your children have tools for reducing their stress, and are comfortable using them, it reduces your stress too!

I’ve been become the “Stress Expert” at Parenting Press because I’ve written a book called “Mudras; Ancient Gestures to Ease Modern Stress,” and because of my thirty years experience as a massage therapist.
 During the month of June, we’ll talk about the following ways to reduce stress:
 1. Breathing, slowly and deeply.
 2.Simple self-massage of the shoulders, neck,  head and hands.
 3. Gestures that can move us from anxious to calm, tense to relaxed, scattered to focus.
 4. How we can teach some of these same skills to our children.

 Let us start with the breath. Whenever I work on the shoulders of clients, I ask them to take four long, deep breaths from way down in their belly. As they do this, I can feel their  muscles start to relax. Anyone can do this.  And it gets them out of their “fight or flight” responses. So, just try it.  The next time you become aware that your neck or shoulders are tight, try breathing with awareness.

Here is how to do it:

Get in a comfortable position.  Your back should be straight, your feet uncrossed.
Begin breathing. Start with your belly. Place a hand on your belly to feel it filling up.
Keep breathing as your belly fills up, your chest expands, and your lungs fill up.
Pause – When you can’t breathe in anymore, be aware of your breath for just a moment.
Release Breath. Your lungs start emptying out, your chest contracts, and then your belly feels empty.
Pause again. Be aware of your empty belly for just a moment.
Start the cycle over. Begin breathing again.

It’s hard to believe something this simple can relieve stress, but it can and it does. The more you practice, the more it will help.